The LACAS Chronicles

delivering the truth we believe in

A Series of Unfortunate Ideals: The Three Wonders of the World.

We’re all familiar with the ‘Seven Wonders of the World’, be it The Great Wall of China or the magnificent Eiffel Tower. However, in observation of my fellow Earthlings, I’ve come across far more wonders that the rest of the world seems to be missing out on. These wonders arise not out of the monumental achievements of hard labor, but out of a cultural and intellectual landscape (or lack thereof) which has fostered distinct groups of people who hold rather unfortunate ideals in our modern society. So without further ado, let us delve into these particular groups of people, and see just why they too deserve to be looked at as wonders of the world. 

  1. Flat Earthers Unite!

Imagine the shock of thousands of scientists around the globe, aided by decades of research material and technological complexities, whey they discovered the existence of a “Flat-Earth Society”. Simply unimaginable. 

Flat Earthers, distressed by the faked “moon-landing” and equally disturbing conventionality of a globular Earth, have taken it as their responsibility to educate and unmask the truth to the world. Truly heroic, I must say.

Just recently, Flat-earthers feared social distancing could push some people over the edge, flinging them off into the void of darkness, or as scientists say: space. Similarly, before social distancing was brought into existence by COVID-19, this particular society was interested in sailing across the world to the Antarctic region to finally unveil reality. They (obviously) would’ve used GPS to navigate their way through. However, it is worth noting that GPS works because, well the Earth is a…globe.

Regardless of the onslaught of criticism this clan of people have received, they claim:

“This is not a conspiracy theory,” 

 “This is a conspiracy fact.”

And we seriously applaud how well they handled the situation.

  1. How to know if you’re a Desi Aunty in disguise:

If you happen to belong to the South-Asian community, it is no surprise that you’re familiar with the nuances of a Desi Aunty; either from having seen plenty around or (conspiracy theory…fact?) being one yourself, there is, for obvious reasons, little argument that these are definitely the sweetest beings to exist. 

Moreover, these groups tend to hold certain ideals with immense importance, ideals which are in certain cases, slightly debatable (rip diplomacy).

How to know if you’re a Desi Aunty in disguise:

  • You play too much “Ludo Star” in your free time (read: 24/7)

If you believe you’re simply obsessed with ‘Ludo Star’, you might need to reconsider your life choices. However still, seeing that it is an entertaining way to become richer than Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk combined, being a millionaire on a mobile app is certainly better than the mundanity of real-life. 

  • You believe being a doctor or engineer are the only successful careers:

While being a doctor or engineer are highly reputable and vital career prospects in any community, it is important to branch off from professions that are already saturated, and instead work in fields that efficiently make use of one’s interests and capabilities. One aspect of life every Desi child should know is that it’s practically a sin to choose arts over sciences as your career.

  • Pooja, what is this behavior? 

Imagine getting 97% in your physics exam with countless cups of coffees and sleep deprivation being the only source of continuance, and still being asked to get a 100% instead of the rather disappointing 97%.

 In other words, you’ve basically failed. We’d only like to say this in response: 

Pooja, calm down.

These are (of-course) generalizations and don’t represent the entire community.

3. Anti-Feminists:

Perhaps the most significant “wonder of the world”, are our very own anti-feminists. These groups of people are so determined and resolute against the feministic movement that they forget that these ideals work for their benefit. In fact, in regions governed by a sense of feminism, men are likely to be relieved from gender stereotypes that harm their mental composure. Furthermore, this links back to how corrupted ideals can impact various aspects of society. 

Similarly, our dear anti-feminists sometimes exist just to prove a point, and they don’t seem to realize they’ve thrown themselves into a trap until after it’s too late. Please go practice your “comebacks” and we’d just like to say the following in response : you reap what you sow.
Regardless of whether you know “The Seven Wonders of the World,” (can you even name all of them?), we can assure you that the aforementioned wonders are simply too magnificent to have gone unnoticed or unacknowledged by you.

Hania Bajwa
TLC Writer

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